{"product_id":"im-glad-you-didnt-die-heres-some-socks-christmas-card","title":"I'm Glad You Didn't Die, Here's Some Socks Christmas Card","description":"\u003ch2 style=\"color: #F82B2B;\"\u003eI'm Glad You Didn't Die, Here's Some Socks Card: Funny Holiday Survival Stationery\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003eAnother chaotic year is officially in the books, and you survived against all odds! Celebrate endurance, life, and cozy tootsies with the \u003cstrong\u003eI'm Glad You Didn't Die, Here's Some Socks Christmas Card\u003c\/strong\u003e. Featuring a beaming mid-century vintage Santa Claus proudly brandishing a fresh pair of knit socks, this design cuts straight through holiday fluff with the ultimate pragmatic greeting: \"I'M GLAD YOU DIDN'T DIE THIS YEAR \/ HERE'S SOME SOCKS.\" Perfect for resilient best friends, sarcastic siblings, close coworkers, and anyone who appreciates practical gifts and dark humor over cheesy seasonal rhymes.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003eSkip generic, mass-produced drugstore lameness for a hilariously blunt holiday tribute guaranteed to claim prime real estate on the mantel. Sized at standard \u003cstrong\u003e5\" x 7\"\u003c\/strong\u003e, each card is professionally printed on premium heavyweight luster cardstock for rich vintage color depth, sharp illustration detail, and a crisp, durable finish. The interior is left completely blank so you can personalize your handwritten messages, inside roasts, or heartfelt survival congratulations, and every card comes complete with a matching white mailing envelope ready for gifting.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch3 style=\"color: #F82B2B;\"\u003eFunny Sarcastic Christmas Card \u0026amp; Novelty Holiday Stationery Specifications\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n  \u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eDimensions:\u003c\/strong\u003e 5\" x 7\" folded\u003c\/li\u003e\n  \u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eStock:\u003c\/strong\u003e Heavyweight luster cardstock\u003c\/li\u003e\n  \u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eInterior:\u003c\/strong\u003e Blank for personalized handwritten messages\u003c\/li\u003e\n  \u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eIncludes:\u003c\/strong\u003e Matching mailing envelope\u003c\/li\u003e\n  \u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eOccasion:\u003c\/strong\u003e Sarcastic Christmas greetings, funny sibling gifts, coworker exchanges, White Elephant parties\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"The Original Underground","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":67730812240063,"sku":"GLADYOUDIDNTDIECARD081425","price":4.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0793\/3768\/5183\/files\/Im-Glad-You-Didnt-Die-Heres-Some-Socks_Card_Mock.jpg?v=1792695009","url":"https:\/\/shop.youshop.company\/products\/im-glad-you-didnt-die-heres-some-socks-christmas-card","provider":"YouShop","version":"1.0","type":"link"}